Monday, 1 January 2024

The associated loss

One thing I hadn't considered was the loss of the support system…

In my mind I was aware things would be different and that I'd miss them and there would be big moments and everyday moments that I couldn't share with them. 

But I hadn't realised how significant it was to go from a loving, supportive - albeit temperamental! - family to nothing. 
I am aware that people have that happen to them, everywhere, for various reasons. 
But there are also a lot of existential realisations that don't occur until you're living the moment. 

Realising you're alone is hard. And right now I just don't have the motivation to change that. Depression is a vicious cycle and it's a medical condition for a reason. 

And while I'm comfortable with my own company and I enjoy my own space, being alone in the world is hard. 

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